bittersweet

We've had a bittersweet night at our house. It is pouring the rain and the wind is a constant howl. Natalie is sleeing soundly in her daddy's arms and the satalite is out. Daddy is sleeping too, so here I sit. I am somewhat sad because tonight, Chris and I packed up most of Natalie's 0-3 months clothes. She is so long that she is just one inch from nine month clothes, but so slender that her weight is still 0-3 months. But alas we can't snap the clothes any more so we must go with her height. Everyone said she would change quickly. I believed them. And she is. She is smiling now and crying louder. She recognizes us and her two dogs. She is a Daddy's girl and likes her Mommy's milk a lot. She has captured our hearts in unimaginable ways. My mom always told me that I would not be able to understand her love for me until I had a daughter of my own. It amazes me that she loves me this much. I ached this week for that mom in Missouri whose daughter was kidnapped. I cringe at the news when they speak of daycare abuse and parental abuse. I wrap her up in my arms and pray for her. I never paid much attention to the news or world events until a few months ago. Now I find myself hoping and praying she can grow up in a free country, not in fear of terrorists or sterotyping a group of people because of similar religious beliefs. I see everything differently and I'm trying to wipe my eyes because right now it's all foggy. I knew our lives would never be the same. I just had no idea that unconditional love would be so easy and would trigger so many other emotions. Every day I give her to the God who created her, named her, and loves her mom and her more then anyone else ever could. He can take care of her far better then me. I'm just so grateful that He allows her to live at our house. Hopefully she will love it here and love us. But more then that we hope and pray she loves Him.