30

I turned 30 last week. I had a great day, Chris, Natalie, and everyone spoiled me a bit. That's always fun. Chris drew me an awesome picture of tulips and framed it to match our room. (plus he and Natalie gave a gift certificate for a manicure and pedicure- I can't wait.) I am more then impressed with him all of the time. We went out last night and had a date. I love that we still have fun. Here are a few pictures~ enjoy the very preggo belly. :-)






And my goal for this year, well, it's a big one. My goal for my thirtieth year on this earth is:

I want to finish peeing before the toilet automatically flushes and splashes my butt.

Let's pray that I can make that happen.

To my patient

I am so sorry.

I'm sorry that your death was as chaotic as your life.

I'm sorry that despite all of our efforts, your parents made life miserable for you up till your last breath.

I'm sorry that it all went down the way it did last night.

I'm sorry that you felt like your mom was "finally being a mom" simply because she was present.

I'm sorry that your family continued to steal your medications.

I'm sorry you died last night without anything for pain, because of their decisions.

I'm sorry you didn't have anything for pain because I feel like somehow, being the destroyer of your narcotics, makes me to blame as well.

I'm sorry that we weren't there.

I'm sorry that the law wouldn't let us go later.

I'm sorry you died there, you told me you didn't want to be there.

I'm sorry you were younger then me.

I'm sorry you never really knew what a mom was supposed to be about.

I'm sorry your dad was as he is.

I'm sorry that the entire system failed you from the day you were born until this morning, the day you died.

I'm sorry that for the first time in my life, it was your death that made me believe there are some people who really cannot be helped.

I'm sorry that it will take me a few days to sort through this and know we did make your life better.

I'm sorry all we could offer were bandages for physical wounds, hands to check you over, and an ear to hear only a piece of who you were.

Most of all, I'm sorry that you were never, ever, ever, given a chance to discover who you were.

Really.

I am so very sorry.

A much needed update

Here is a much overdue update from our household. Between work, church, vacations, Natalie, house remodeling and just pure exhaustion, this blog has definitely taken a back seat. But, here we go.

Momma duck is still sitting on her eggs. We are trying to determine the best way to tell her they are likely not going to hatch. Any ideas?

We all ventured to Disney World last weekend. We met up with Chris' Mom, Grandmama, and other family for the Magic Kingdom last Friday. Then my parents came down for the weekend and we went with them to Animal Kingdom on Saturday. Natalie was fairly impressed this time around with the all the activity. The whole weekend she just really, really, really, wanted to see Minnie Mouse. Late Saturday, she had her chance. Mickey and Minnie were together. She totally by passed Mickey, who offered her a high five, and ran to Minnie, and gave her a hug and kiss. Here is the cute picture of the event.



Then back to real life this week. Work has been busier then I could ever explain. I've got far more patients on a caseload then I should, but it changes so fast. They are trying to get our numbers back down, which will be nice.

And, the pregnancy is going well. I do have gestational diabetes again. :-( Very distraught about this. I had pretty well convinced myself that I didn't have it with Natalie, but the three hour test here confirmed it all. My numbers were pretty high. So I'm back on a strict diet of lots of protein and not so much of anything that I like. My blood sugar is being a little more unpredictable this time around too. It's either pretty low or a little high. I see the doctor again this week and am curious to see what they say. I'm being good though, so it's frustrating. As for the baby, he's bouncing and moving and seems quite active. Natalie is enjoying singing to him and feeling him kick her. Pray for her though. I don't think she is grasping that he will be out of my belly one day. :-)Here is a good prego pic while I'm convincing Natalie to stand with Jimminy Cricket.



We are starting to plan for my baby girl's third birthday party in a few weeks. I still can't wrap my mind around that. I look at her with her new hair cut and know there is no baby left in that child. She's independent, feisty, bold, hysterical, and quite loving. If this boy is laid back I'm afraid he won't stand a chance against her.



Well, that's all for now, we are off for groceries and all that is Saturday. Have a great weekend!